Tuesday, June 7, 2016

I Hate People Days

Nearly every time I'm at the grocery store, usually right after dropping the kids at school, I run into lots of other parents at the grocery store who have also just dropped their kids off at the very same school.  I would prefer a quick head nod, wave, be on my way since we all just laid eyes on each other not 10 minutes earlier.  But to my chagrin, most are eager for social hour in frozen foods. I don't want to socialize in the grocery store. I don't want to chat about summer travel plans. I want to find the peas and purchase ingredients for sloppy joes and be on my way.

I wonder if they are feeling the same way.  Are we all just standing around having conversations we don't want to have out of the same sense of social obligation?  Imagine the freedom if we could all just agree to ignore each other!

Anyway.  It may be the limping-towards-the-finish-line end of the school year fatigue, but it's truth -- I'm experiencing a string of what my best friend in college and I used to call, "I Hate People Days."  I Hate People Days happen when one annoyance comes right after another.  They're usually small stupid petty problems that wouldn't register much on any other day.  But when they start to accumulate, begin to pile on top of each other like freaky people in a Bosch painting, the end result can leave you fuming and looking around like, "Did I seriously just like this world yesterday?"

I will get over it.  I will not remain annoyed with all people forever because I don't want to end up a hermit living in a hollowed out tree trunk.  Until then, being pushed to the brink is kind of useful.  It's near euphoric to unfriend someone on FB without caring if they get mad at you.  The knowledge their oversharing nonsense will never again scorch your eyeballs makes it worth being abrupt.

As uncomfortable as they can be, I Hate People Days serve a purpose.  They limit your patience in such a way you're forced to clean house, get rid of the riff raff on the periphery.  After a few days of seething and making rage-filled adjustments, I can once again watch animal videos online and chuckle without thinking, "I am so sick of everyone telling me to LOL at these animal videos."

Maybe I need a good night's sleep.  In the morning I'll avoid the newspaper article that tells me Trump could easily be our next President.  That would start things off on the wrong foot.  Actually -- I should probably just avoid newspapers and news websites in general for the near future because there's little in there that makes me think, "Way to rock it, World!"  I should also spend the 45 minutes walking the kids to school instead of driving because driving in Seattle during its growth spurt can turn people into serial killers.  That is not a published fact but I'm convinced.

I'll ignore the phone call from the renter who doesn't like the overhead fixture in the dining room of our rental house so wants me to replace it.  I'll also hide around the corner of the house to avoid that neighbor who never, ever gets to the point he's trying to make but still keeps saying, "Like, you know?"  No, I don't know. I have no goddamn idea what you're talking about.

I'll pull out of this seething stretch of days as I've pulled out of all the others.  In the meantime, I'll be the one wearing a ski mask in the grocery store.  It may not end well with grocery store security but still -- incognito.  no talkie talk.

*cape swish*



  1. Oh I hear ya sister...I really really do.

    Let it out!

  2. My promise to myself not to watch or listen to anymore politics usually lasts about six hours and then I gotta connect again to see what is going on. Recently the changes seem to happen hourly. Hang in there, the sun will come out in Seattle tomorrow? (I'm with her and YOU).

  3. May I suggest going to a new grocery store for the next little while and keeping a steady supply of weed and wine at the ready?:)